Are You Dating A Manipulator?...

Ladies be aware of ravenous wolves dressed in sheep clothing. I am referring to the kind of man who preys on you while pretending to pray for you. They wine and dine you then flips disagreements to make it look like you are in the wrong.

     This is the type of man will get upset with you when things are not going his way. He will do ABC, as long as you are doing 123, he will check-up on you on a regularly. He will even financially support you, and have the audacity to get jealous when another man shows interest in you. He will even ask you not to see anyone else, when all he is doing is pretending as if he has real interest in you.

You will know them by their reaction when you mention these words "Commitment" And "Celibacy until marriage" 

              These are manipulators and commitment phobe men.

THE MANIPULATOR

These types of men will say whatever and do whatever to get what they want and when they get whatever it is they want from you, they are out! Usually it is your body, money, or something of temporary value to them. I say it is temporary because once they get what they want; they are off to the next victim. To them it is temporary. To you the value is worth more than temporary gratification. Therefore, words of advice do not give what is valuable to you to someone who do not deserve it and have not proved that they are worth it. 

      Essentially the reason why these men have been successful with this kind of behavior is that most women have allowed themselves to become a prey, instead of standing their ground and sticking to their standards. Another reason is that some women do not have a standard.

SIGNS OF A MANIPULATOR  

• Narcissistic behaviors and everything is about them. Their desires, their wants, when they want and how they want. Regardless of how it makes you feel. With this kind of individual, you are always aiming to please them but can never hit the mark because nothing you do will ever be good enough. 
• Guilt tripping, nothing is ever their fault and if they admit to a fault, they will in turn make you feel bad for pointing it out. 
• Emotion drainer. Something always comes up to make them not follow through with a prior Commitment. Some excuses are that they were sick. They had an emergency. Someone close to them or a friend of theirs had a death in the family. The excuses are usually extreme, because they want you to feel bad for even questioning their unfulfilled obligations. They never feel like you love them and have no problem telling you that you don not love them. 

Does this ring a bell? "You don't love me, because if you did you wouldn't be asking me all these questions." This is not about you not loving them, it is more about them making you feel miserable enough to start apologizing and giving up your right to take up for yourself. 

THE COMMITMENT PHOBE

These types of men are who you really have to stay on the lookout for because if you are not careful you can lose your heart to them without even realizing it. There is a difference between a commitment phobe and a person who is only being cautious about jumping into a new relationship. A commitment phobic has to resort to tricks and thievery to get the price 'The love of a woman' with no intentions of loving her back. 

      A man who is not ready or willing to commit will begin to back pedal in a conversation when the person they are dating starts asking about going to the next level. The next level could be spending more time together, meeting each others perspective families, and for some living together. Though that is not an idea I support, because living together should be reserve for marriage. That is entirely a different topic. 

Some of the excuses a commitment phobe use during these 'heart to heart' conversation are things like "I'm not ready." “Things are good the way they are. Why are you trying to change things?"  Oh, this is a good one "Let’s just see where things are going." This one is my favorite "Let’s just kick it?"

     "Kick what?"                                    

   When did courting a woman become "kicking it?" Such obnoxious words put together should get any man saying them to a woman kicked straight to the curb. Boys kick it! Men court! While boys will play games, a mature man will makes his intentions clear. A man who is mature will see the value in a mature woman and will not miss his blessing by playing her for a fool. 

SIGNS OF A COMMITMENT-PHOBE: 

• Unable to pin down anything more than 2 days in advance
• Unwillingness  to talk about the future or their intentions/ motives in regards to you and them 
• No use of words like “us” or “we”
• Unreliable about returning communication or following up on planned dates
• Sudden emotional withdrawal
• Blowing hot one day  and cold  another day
• Inability to take blame for actions or claim responsibility for relationship issues

Trying to have a relationship with a man like this will not lead to anything but heartbreak. Raise the bar ladies and the men who dares to reach for it by going above and beyond, is the one who deserves the price. Your heart, your devotion, and your hand in marriage.